It doesn't help that I'm all stuffy from this rotten cold and my muscles are sore (not sure why except carrying Bella on Halloween night) and I've just been grumpy the past couple of days. I feel really out of sorts. I don't feel connected to my girlfriends anymore. Everyone is off on their own. Everyone is busy volunteering at various schools, working and doing other things together. We don't have playdates anymore. We don't do any Mom's Nights. No holiday get togethers. It all feels really disconnected and I'm not liking it. I'm not sure what can be done though. Maybe it's all a part of growing up and growing apart?
Our core group has been together for over 5 years with a few others in our circle coming later. We all get along wonderfully and enjoy each other's company. There's no beef with anyone (at least not from my perspective). I just feel lonely I guess. I wonder if my hormones are shifting again since Bella is eating more solid foods and nursing less. Maybe that's why this is all coming out. To all my friends who read my blog, please don't be alarmed or anything. I still love you all. I'm just feeling blah right now and had to get it out. Dh doesn't get it. He doesn't have close knit friends like I do.
Please tell me I'm not the only one who feels this way- at least sometimes.
(I almost didn't post this. I may come back later and delete it so I don't look completely pathetic LOL)
4 years ago
8 comments:
We all feel that way some time Karlise. And it's hard to see/hear about people getting together all the time without you.
I feel disconnected quite frequently and I'm sad that there are no more playdates too. I really enjoyed getting out of the house 2-3 times a week to let Shawn play with his friends and I would love that for Joshua. So no, you are not alone and definitely not pathetic.
I think the biggest problem is that so many kids are in school now, so there are fewer available for morning playdates, and they have homework and activities after school. Also, I know that some of us are closer to others in the group and do things together without inviting the rest of the group, so group playdates aren't as important anymore.
Maybe the solution is to put some regular playdates on the calendar and try to recruit new members to get some new tots for the younger kids to play with.
I think a group meeting may be in order to discuss the situation.
{{{{HUGS}}}} I'm sorry you're feeling blue! I know what you mean about missing the old days of the playgroup. It's hard when you're still in the baby stage, and for others it's all about school and big kid activities.
We definitely need to try harder to make time for our friends!
Karlise
I also have a group of friends that I have had for the past 4 years. I do/did feel the same way, but I think that is just the nature of things.
My playgroup just had our halloween party today, and it was great to have the group back together. We also don't really do mno anymore but we did start a book club (wed night is the second meeting) and a bunco night. OF course with everyone's busy schedule not everyone gets to come to everything, but we get to see each other.
Tonight at the halloween party, we decided to do a thanksgiving potluck. We are holding it the Sunday after Thanksgiving, and it will be nice to see everyone again. We also are having our annual cookie exchange in Dec, altho there is some minor squabbling about the date right now.
I don't know if you all go through a group site (we go through yahoo groups), but post that you want to see everyone. I am sure your friends feel the same way!
Karlise, that was a big problem when I was with BAM. I was working full-time, trying to get to know other mom's because working from home is impossible to meet people and trying to get Elizabeth (at the time) to meet other children. I know my lack of participation became a problem being that I could not keep up with the requirements. I still wonder about some of the mom's, the daily trivia, etc. and even though I did not attend as many playdates, I truly miss being part of the group. The emails were fantastic and felt even like I had a group of friends, whether just to share good things, or bad things, the support. I wish things had been different and my "membership" or lack of, was not that difficult.
Oops, I didn't finish my thought...But yes, time does change and the kids get older, have their own friends, etc. But I am sure BAM still tries to get together for the big things, etc. Maybe you can plan one of your Mom's Night Out and see what works best for the majority of the mom's...I know you loved the Melting Pot...LOL!
Karlise, I know how you are feeling. I have lost touch with people and it makes me sad. The group is not what it used to be, but I have no clue how to get it back without it becoming a full time job again. I just can't handle it on top of everything else that I do. Unfortunately the group has always been more for me than Olivia because of lack of girls in the group. The only reason I still see some of the group is because we are all involved in the same things, like school and bible study. I want the group to fulfill your needs and I am open to change. Let's talk....
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